“Neenee, I cleaned up all my toys!” announces Dija over the sound of Trey vacuuming.

“Dija you still have more to do. I walked past your door and saw there’s still a mess. Neenee if you put all the chairs up on the table I can finish my job.”

Wow, dictator Trey is in the house!

It’s Saturday morning and we’re getting ready for tomorrow’s celebration. We’re having an “It’s Official” Party and the kids are helping plan it. So cleaning the house is on the list and then picking up cake and filling the water jugs. They want to be a part of all of it. They like parties but this one is special to them. Almost like a birthday but not quite. 

There are a few secrets about the party I cannot put into publish until they happen – the kids know what it is but they don’t know that it’s a surprise for some people. We’re having cake with Trey’s choice of words on top – “It’s Official.”  We’ll have a video loop playing with pictures of the kids over the past 22 months that they have been living here. Uncle Justin is setting up the big screen with projector for those who will attend via Skype. There will be a special announcement made via Skype from Wichita, Kansas. Uncle Jeff and Auntie Lisa will make a special appearance because it’s the only way to get in on the action! Jeff will be announcing the children’s new official names.

We’ve invited family and close friends and neighbours who know and love the kids and have been by our sides during the process that has brought us here. The kids will feel the love as they understand that everyone is coming to celebrate that it’s official. To them official means they will live with Neenee and Papa forever. We will be the parents who will take care of them forever. They know we are very happy about this decision that the Judge has made concerning them. They watched the decision happen in the court room and thanked the judge with us.

It’s been a busy emotional week. Not only are we explaining adoption and court process but the children also attended a citizenship ceremony. It was finally Papa’s turn to become a Canadian. Explaining to the children where we would be going was interesting. You see Papa wasn’t born in the same country that we were born in. “I was born in Canada, Dija was born in Canada, you were born in Canada, Nana was born…” Trey started listing the entire family excluding Papa. He was getting the picture!

Dija politely interjects, “Only girls have boobies right Neenee?” I’m not sure she was following the discussion. So I continued to explain how Papa had lived here a long time but needed to write a test and go make a pledge to become a Canadian.  It was quite the ceremony. The kids took it all in and were happy to get in on the photos at the end of it all. A lady that I know and love was officiating so it made it rather special for us. Elizabeth Par Johnston (google her she’s pretty amazing) did the official pledge and led us all in our commitment to be Canadian Citizens. Then we sang our national anthem. Nobody told me it would be so emotional! Perhaps it was in part due to the overload of emotional “stuff” this week? Then the family made the evening news. Lots of people told us about it but somehow we managed to miss it each time it was on.

Stay tuned for the after party blog… oh after trick or treating too. I’ll share the new official names then.

Today was the big day. The day we went into Supreme Court and heard the Judge say the words. It is official now. We are the proud parents of two adorable little kids. Sure we’ve been proud parents before but that was sort of planned and expected after the 9 months of waiting each time. We didn’t ask for, expect, think, or imagine we’d be doing this again. However, we’d have it no other way. There were a lot of things in place for this to happen the way it did. First of all, we unexpectedly lived “back home” where we didn’t think we’d be living again. Then there was the “empty nest” that enabled us to take on wee ones once again. The list is actually a little longer… employment status, Nana the sitter nearby, our health, etc. Oh and our fabulous Lawyer who really made us breathe easy each time we needed her help. She might not appreciate her name inserted here but you can contact me if you need a great lawyer. We arrived at the courthouse to find out what we needed to do – nothing, just be there. Then Nana brought the kids a little while later to join us. The Judge spoke the words and that was it. Then came the photo shoot. We all stood up front with the Judge and had pictures taken so one day when they are older they can see how and where it all happened. They each sat in the Judges big chair and chatted with the Judge. Dija was happy that the Judge didn’t eat her (this was her fear of going to court today and not understanding what a judge was). The kids both understand that it is official now – they get to live with Neenee and Papa forever. The Judge was making an important decision for us and we’re very happy about it. The kids wanted Nana to be part of the adoption too. They think all three of us are adopting them so we’ll go with that. Nana was there with us. It seemed rather simple after such a long agonizing process… in just 7 more weeks it will be 2 years that the kids have been living with us. I guess time flies when you’re having fun… or too busy to notice, perhaps a bit of both. Today I know we’ve made a difference. We have impacted the lives of two children who could have had a much different future. We have taken fragments of a family and made it whole. These children will be loved, cared for and given opportunities. It seemed like such a simple process this morning to simply hear the order but I know this is nothing simple… it won’t always be easy. We will get tired, stressed, and likely want to pull our hair (well, mine!) out some days. I know about parenting! I will remind myself that this was a decision made for Dija and Trey… two little lives who deserve the absolute best.

Many people have commented about us having the children and doing the whole parenting thing all over again… “I don’t know how you do it” and I never really have an answer other than to tell them I’d have it no other way. These comments do make me think.  The kids are pretty adorable – but they could be adorable when they visit us. They provide entertainment – but again, they could go home at night! Today I had the thought, “what if they weren’t with us?”  That is a difficult thought to have and so I quickly think of the reasons I enjoy having them around.

Story time is always a great time for me to sit and listen to Papa reading and kids interacting and helping with the story. I love just listening from a distance.  So the evening when Papa is out of town I get to sit on the sofa with the kids and do the story part. It’s not my job but when I need to do it I am capable. So the second book chosen for the evening was “Commotion in the Ocean” sent to us by Isayah and Jonah (the cousins).

The book looks at all kinds of creatures in the ocean. Sharks, octopus, crabs, lobsters, turtles…. oh and angelfish. When we get to the angelfish the book says something like “the prettiest thing in the sea, what a shame there are no other creatures as gorgeous and lovely as me!” Trey quickly points to the pretty fish and says, “That’s Neenee!”  Now keep in mind that I know I look nothing like a fish but I understand that what the boy was saying is simple… Lovely = Neenee!

So when people ask me how I do it, I now have an answer… I do it because I’m lovely. At least to a 4 year old boy who adores me almost as much as his Papa does.