Problem Solving
11:51 am | No Comments » |
Up to this point Mom was still very adamant that she did not need help and was very capable of looking after herself. All she was worried about was getting to the mall, coming home and getting into her pajamas.
I contacted Department of Health, continuing care and found out they have an in-home care service available. They would come into her apartment morning, noon and night and heat her meals and make sure she took her pills. We started hiding her pills in her closet, hiding her food in the crisper in the fridge and I washed her few pieces of laundry.
One day I went to Mom’s apartment just as the continuing care worker was heating her food. Mom was enjoying the continuing care workers, she liked the company. While she ate in the living room the CCW and I chatted in the kitchen. After a few minutes we both went in and sat down with mom. She was loving her dinner, potatoes, carrots, gravy and roast beef.
Mom has a small coffee table with a shelf underneath. As she ate I noticed pieces of something scattered on the shelf. I bent down and there was her roast beef from her supper. There was also ham and turkey from I don’t know when. Howthe got there we’re not sure. One thing to remember, there is no sense in asking why, no sense in getting upset because they really can’t tell you why. The only thing to do is watch a bit closer and figure out how to solve the problem.
We found out the next day (now we sat with her as soon as she was given her food) that she couldn’t eat the meat because she found it too difficult with her dentures. Problem solved-cut it up very small and mix with gravy. Easy!
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July 7, 2008
10:10 am | No Comments » |
I apologize, it’s been awhile since my last blog. I forgot – just kidding. I guess I shouldn’t joke but sometimes a bit of humour is needed. A lot has happend since February, now where was I?
It would seem as though Mom decided to go “off the pill.” Her memory was getting worse almost by the day. My brother, Bill, and I decided it would be best if we gave her the pills she was to take. So every morning and at suppertime either Bill or I would go to her apartment and give her her pills. We were surprised to find out that one of the perscriptions was three months past due to be filled. We finally got the perscriptions under control.Now it was the meals.
Since Mom’s diet consisted of only Cheerios and lemon tarts I decided I would go grocery shopping for her. I bought her banana bread, margarine, bread, basic stuff. I took everything to her apartment.We put everything away and had a little lunch, she loved it, especially the banana bread. The next morning it was my turn to dispense the meds so I went to her apartment when I opened the fridge it was empty, with the exception of the lemon tarts and skim milk. I asked her where the banana bread was. She said she ate it and it was delicious.
I looked everywhere in her apartment. It was all gone, with the exception of the margarine. She told me I could take that home, she bought it and doesn’t think she’ll use it because she doesn’t eat toast. Frustrated I called my brother. We decided the only way we could make sure she ate was if we made her food, took it down and labelled it. So every Sunday I would make her dinners up for the week and freeze them. Monday mornings I would take the food down, put it in the fridge and explain I would be there to heat – them up. One of us would make her breakfast – oatmeal or scrambled eggs – give her her pills, call Senior Wheels to take her to the mall and bring her home. Suppertime was the same heat up, serve and pills. This worked for about a week. She started throwing out all of the pre-made meals, containers and all. She would tell us she ate it that would mean container and all. We didn’t know what to do next. We needed advice, help, something.
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February 11, 2008
Forget Me Not
3:51 pm | 2 Comments » |My daughters were in the mall one day in October and sat down with their nana. The man who was sitting with her told them to give me his telephone number because he needed to talk to me. He told them that Mom was wearing the same clothes to the mall every day. I never called, Mom loved to shop for new clothes and her closet was full. So I went to her apartment to see what was in her closet. There was a housecoat and a stained t-shirt. I asked her where her clothes were and she pointed to the skirt, blouse and pantyhose that were hung over her rocking chair. That was it, that was all she needed. Why did she need anything else, her earrings and necklace matched perfectly. I tried to explain that she needed to change her clothes, “why?” she would ask. “Why does anyone care what I wear?””It’s no one’s business but my own”. My youngest daughter was with me that day and Mom looked at her and asked her why she should have to change her clothes. My daughter told her it made her look like she was homeless. She didn’t care.
The next day I went to Zellers and bought her a new burgundy blouse. It had to have a collar, buttons and long sleeves, not too long though. I bought a new skirt, new pantyhose and new jewellery to match. It took a lot of convincing but I managed to get her to try it on. She loved it. The next day I took her to Frenchys and tried to pick out some new tops for her. Everything I pick up, “I don’t like that, wrong colour, the sleeves are too long.” Finally I just picked out a few and dragged her in a dressing room. I had to go in and undress and dress her because she was not trying anything on, she didn’t need any more new clothes, she had a new top at home. Next was the hair – she needed a perm. That took a couple of days of trying to convince her. Finally I just picked her up and drove her to the hairdressers, paid and made her sit and wait until it was her turn. My brother picked her up and drove her home. That night I stopped in to see how she made out. She said, “do you like my hair? I decided to have it done today.” It looked great. So, we had the clothes taken care of, the hair was taken care of, we’re good, we thought.
It was getting worse by the day. We had her re-tested. Yes, she had slipped a bit. Her diet consisted of Honeynut Cheerios for breakfast, for lunch at the mall was Tim Hortons pea soup, supper was Honeynut Cheerios and for a snack lemon tarts. The only groceries she bought were Cheerios and lemon tarts. She went to the mall every day except for Sunday. One day I went to pick her up for a doctor’s appointment. I had told her I would be there to pick her up and then drop her off at the mall. When I got there she was gone. I went to the mall, walked around the mall and could not find her. I was starting to panic. I went over to the Tim Hortons in the mall and ordered a cup of tea, not really in the mood for one but trying to figure out a way to describe Mom to them to see if they had seen her that morning. I ordered my tea and asked the lady at the counter, do you know the lady that comes to the mall every day? She said you mean your mother? She was here a while ago and said she was on her way home. Sure enough I drove back to her apartment and there she was eating her Cheerios.
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January 31, 2008
Forget Me Not
11:09 am | 6 Comments » |I never considered myself as a blogger. In fact, the less I have to sit in front of a computer, the better. I don’t really like to read blogs, I don’t really like to read. Some of my co-workers love to blog and post their thoughts, stories and tips weekly. I never really had anything to blog about. That is, until recently.
If you read my blog I welcome your comments. If any of you have gone through this I certainly would welcome any advice or if anyone reads this and thinks this terrible disease is happening to your loved one I would certainly help out with my advice as best as I can.
Here goes. I am the proud mother of two beautiful daughters – one is 18 and the other 14. I have been happily married over 20 years. I have three brothers and one sister, and then there’s my mother, Marcella. My mother has Alzheimers, I would like to share with you some of the many challenges we have faced and some of the funny stories.
Growing up I knew her name was really Marcella but no one ever called her that. Her middle name is Kathleen. Most people called her Kay, some called her Katherine. I guess she got tired of people asking her how to spell Marcella. My mother was diagnosed about two years ago with the early onset of Alzheimer’s. A few early signs were notes starting to go up around her apartment -detergent in here, soap in here. Nothing major, I sometimes forget where I put things. Then the name change – she would no longer answer to Kay or Katherine, she would correct people, people she has known for as long as I can remember and they never called her Marcella. “My name is not Kay it is Marcella”. We convinced her to go to the doctor and she was given an Alzheimer’s test to see how far advanced the disease was. Mom was still in the range where the “memory pill” would be effective. The “memory pill” (Aricept) does not help you regain memory that you have lost, it slows the progression of loss. If she stopped taking the pill she would go back to the point where she would have been if she had never started. She seemed to be doing ok.
Mom lives in a seniors’ apartment. She got up every day and went off to the mall. She would be there for hours. In the summer she walked or when it rained she would take “the wheels” (Senior Wheels). She spent her time strolling around the mall, scratching (scratch tickets), and sitting with other seniors who also had not much to do at home. She was having a ball and making out just fine, thank you. As time passed the notes were more frequent – dishes in here, cereal in here, going to the mall tomorrow.
Life for me is busy. I work full time, we’ve built three houses in the past 11 years, our youngest daughter is involved in every sport that school has to offer and our oldest daughter has her own business that keeps all of us busy during the summer. I lost track of my mom’s life, or maybe had just been too busy with my own to take a closer look at hers, scared that she might need me too. Did she ever.
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