I’m still here!!! Trust me, going this long without blogging won’t happen again. A whole string of reasons why I haven’t been blogging from computer troubles to laziness to lack of thoughts in this small mind of mine.

The last couple of days it has been nagging at me that I haven’t been blogging but each time I thought to blog, I was wrapped up doing something else. So what better time to blog than in the middle of cleaning my daughter’s room? I’m a great procrastinator and there is nothing that I dislike more than housework so as I was going through the million things that have accumulated on her floor since the last cleaning, I thought now is the perfect time to sit and write.

It’s funny; when I originally started blogging I really didn’t have an idea on how many people would read it or if I would have an impact on people. The blog if anything has put more pressure on me (and if you remember, I don’t react well to pressure) because I feel like I have to eat perfectly and lose every week in order to inspire people. Over the past few weeks, I have come to realize that this is not the case.

For example, I was grocery shopping about a month ago when one of the cashiers (I won’t use their name because I’m not sure they would be comfortable with it but they know who they are!) recognized my name from my air miles card and told me how they loved reading my blog. As we talked, I realized it had nothing to do with whether I was successful or not, it was about the truth and honesty in my thoughts that made them realize that we are all the same.

I have to say; I was surprised to learn that two of my blog fans were males! Not surprised that males would read it but that they would admit it J I’m sure it had something to do with the bra story that got them hooked (Kidding!!) but again made me realize that men and women are alike when it comes to weight loss. Now ladies, I know what you’re thinking, they can lose it so much faster but I can tell you that just because they can lose it faster doesn’t mean that they don’t struggle with the temptations just like we do.

Just today when I turned on my computer to start blogging I had two new messages on my facebook. One sent at 11:43am and the other at 11:45am by two different people recognizing that I hadn’t posted a blog in a while. Call it a sign or a coincidence but it reminded me that people aren’t looking to read about my perfection, they are looking for that one place they can go whether they are having a good day or a bad day and realize that they truly are not alone and that whether we’re big, small, male, or female in the end we’re all human and we’re not perfect.

Original title I know, it was the best I could come up with.

So how many of you have ever been trying to eat healthy and look at those that are eating everything you would love to be munching on and think that they have life by the balls?

I’m at that phase…it’s been fourteen days of eating on track and now I’m becoming disgruntled. Mind you, in a social setting whether I’m being good and eating from a veggie tray or being bad and diving into a Mexican dip platter, I still have fun….so why do I feel all those extra calories are so necessary? If I had the answer, I guess I would be cured from this obesity but alas I do not have the answers.

So yes, I’m disgruntled and heading into the weekend…not a good combination. I am the type that I want the weight off and I want it off now…..if I have a good week eating wise, I want to be rewarded for it on the scale and this is the dreaded week two weigh in so of course I know I’m not going to have a big number and it scares me as to what my reaction afterwards will be. In my mind I keep telling myself, give it another week regardless of the result and you’ll be fine but my gut is telling me I am going to be very angry and not feel that the number that is presented is even worth the effort I put in. A lb is a lb right? That motto only works for me when I see a number I like.

So I’m sitting here and have just finished my last glass of water for the evening…my feet are swelled (no I’m not pregnant) and I’m in a pissy mood….what a way to start the weekend.

Oh well, I’ll get up tomorrow and do my workout at HEAT and feel better, that is always a guarantee. I just have to remember that nothing changes if nothing changes.

I hope everyone has a great weekend

I jumped on the scale last night like I blogged I was going to and was down 8.8 lbs. I was pumped. I knew it was a big number because as I had mentioned, I jumped on the scale Saturday and was down 10.8 lbs but that was from a night weigh in to the day and I fluctuate quite a bit between day time and night time so knew the number wasn’t that high but I’ll definitely go with 8.8 lbs in a week, I can handle that!

When you’re on a roll it really is hard not to set goals but I haven’t been. I just know what I’m like when I set goals and I’m not doing it. I literally am taking each day at a time and at the end of the day when I have stayed on track, I feel accomplished and much better about myself.

I shared yesterday that one of the my key successes has been anticipating upcoming events but another thing that is key no matter what plan you are following is preparation. That doesn’t mean just buying the stuff and putting it in the fridge, it means planning what you are going to do with it. That is what I have done for the last 11 days and it seems to be working.

I feel more satisfied as parent too because I’m watching my kids eat better. My girls have always enjoyed fruit and vegetables but what’s better than an Oreo cookie or a Bear Paw in the eyes of a 4 year old or a 7 year old. When my youngest asks for a bear paw, I suggest whatever fruit we have going in the fridge and she eats it. My oldest is a fussy eater; if I let her eat hotdogs for all three meals and snacks she would so I have started to involve her in picking out what she would love to have for supper. The other night they each made their own home made mini pizza. I baked 2 small whole-wheat pitas until a little crispy and then they added sauce, meat, red and green pepper, and cheese. They loved making them and enjoyed eating them. I think Kenny was a bit jealous that they didn’t make any for him! The only rule that my oldest is struggling with is the “only water or milk at supper time”. She doesn’t like either so she tries to con me into allowing her juice but hey she made up the rule, she has to follow it!

Have a good evening, enjoy the read, and feel free to drop me any suggestions you have for meal ideas, your tricks for staying on track, etc.

Let’s face it, the hardest part of staying on track is the weekends. There are more events going on, more socializing, no appointments to keep us busy for an hour so that we aren’t thinking of food. To sum it up, the weekends can be pure evil.

I find what works for me, is thinking ahead. I try to anticipate the different things I will be doing and what food obstacles I will have to overcome. I knew this weekend would be relatively relaxed because my husband was playing in a ball tournament and it was just the kids and I. The kids and I followed our normal Saturday ritual and with Wendy in tow, headed to the gym. We came home and had lunch and played for a bit and then I could feel it, I was getting bored…and what does Shawna do when she is bored…she heads to the cupboard. So instead of heading to the cupboard, the girls and I went outside instead but the flies were enough to drive you crazy so back in the house we went. Sweet, it’s snack time so I had some strawberries and “thought” about doing the housework but what would be better than relaxing on the recliner while the girls played barbies and fought with one another…after all I just did a double workout, I needed to relax! After my relaxation time, it was time to make supper. Once I make it to supper time I know I will be okay because supper usually will last with me until about 4 hours or so and if I get hungry after that I just go to bed but with the increase in protein, I haven’t been finding that I am all that hungry.

The only thing that I had all weekend that wasn’t on my plan was ½ cup of mashed potatoes and 2 small freezies. If that makes me gain weight then I really am in trouble! Funniest part was that the first thing my husband does when he sees Mary Ann is tell her I had mashed potatoes….what a bastard! Not that I wouldn’t have told her but he ratted me out before I could position it in a way that I wasn’t veering out of control towards my normal chocolate bar, chips, and pop frenzy.

That’s ok I’ve learned my lesson, next time we sit to a meal and I have something on my plate that shouldn’t be there, I’m not telling him because that is the only way he knew. I also told him that the next time I made mashed potatoes he wouldn’t be getting any….come on I’m a woman I can’t just let it go!

I’ll be weighing tonight so will be able to give you my official number since last week. I weighed Saturday morning so I have a good idea of the number but will wait for the official number tonight to share with you. I know, the suspense!

I wish I could freeze frame this moment, not yesterday not tomorrow but right now. Because this moment of being in control and back on track feels amazing yet too often I forget it and will allow myself to think it is too much work. Really though, as I reflect on this last week, it wasn’t that much work. Yes I had to take the time to plan meals but the extra 60 dollars in my account because I wasn’t buying junk or going through drive thru everyday makes that planning well worth it.

I’m not setting a goal, for some reason I spaz out when I set them and end up going the opposite direction so I am just taking one day at a time. Since Saturday, I have drank my water everyday and have eaten 100% on plan. Don’t mistake that as meaning I haven’t craved anything because let me tell you I have but I just keep reminding myself that it’s not worth it.

For now, I’ll be weighing in on Monday nights so I’ll let you know how I make out. One Saturday I want to weigh in during the day because when I initially weighed in a year ago, it was during the day and I weigh more at night so just want to see what the difference is between night and day and what the total weight is that I have lost.

I love the lunchtime classes that I am getting in at HEAT. They are toning classes and I can really notice a difference in the three weeks I have been doing them. Due to travelling to the city, most of my classes in the evening were cardio classes and I would get my strength class in on Saturday. Now I get all my same classes plus three additional strength classes. How sweet is that???

Well I’m off to bed and so happy tomorrow is Friday. Although I love long weekends, having the holiday in the middle of the week made this week seem really short.